As we grow up, we tend to develop feelings of guilt and unworthiness that we pick up along the way.

As babies and toddlers, we have no doubt that we deserve everything we desire. We go for the things that attract us with confidence. What happens along the way? Why do we start feeling unworthy?

We are considered worthy, at school, at home, and in our societies and communities if we achieve specific titles, positions, and goals. Starting at a very young age we are constantly reminded that to be "equal to something" we need to accomplish certain milestones that are important to our families, teachers, relatives, employers, etc.

I remember as a child, my mom used to make all my requests conditional: "If you get good results at school, I'll let you go to your friend's house for a play day", "If you behave nice, you will get ice cream", "If you tidy up your room, you can watch TV", and so on. I am sure you had a similar experience.

Then we grow up into adults, and we think we are now free to make our own choices and decisions. But the truth is, we only treat ourselves if we believe we achieved something remarkable or deserved by working hard. So the feelings of guilt and unworthiness normally show up when we receive an unexpected gift or decide to treat ourselves to something unusual or costly.

That's exactly what happened to me when I travelled to Portugal last year. The feelings of guilt and unworthiness showed up the moment we arrived at the hotel. The comfort, the views, the food, and the fact that I was spending so much money to treat myself to these luxuries, all combined together in a big knot in my stomach, making me feel heavy and unworthy.

I had to put a lot of effort into breathing in and breathing out slowly, to connect to my body and my emotions to understand what was going on. The very next morning, I rolled my mat out on the balcony, looking into the lovely level 4 garden on the ocean view, and started breathing and moving with my breath. A flow was born out of that breath-mind-body-emotion work. The next few mornings, I followed the same flow. And gradually I worked my way through those heavy feelings of guilt and unworthiness.

If you have ever experienced the same, or maybe experiencing it now, then roll your mat out, and practice with me here.

Namaste!